Bump in the Road

There's something so doable about sameness. I'm so sorry to keep making everything be about me, but I feel I need to explain about not blogging so much lately. And not keeping up on everyone else's blogs like I'd like to.

It's ever since losing my job. I don't feel depressed or worried... just different. Nothing really appears to have changed much in my life, other than the person signing my paychecks. I work the same basic days. I sit at the same workstation (for now, but that's to change). I eat lunch with the same people (except for others who are gone and I miss so much).

But at the same time everything feels eerily different. My life, at least for the short-term, is now more or less defined by what has happened. Almost like how everyone remembers where they were and what they were doing when they heard about 9/11. But it's just my own private 9/11. Every event in recent memory gets automatically (but consciously) put into pre- or post-job loss status, and there doesn't seem to be anything I can do about that.

Life just seems to take a lot more energy, and I'm not sure why, exactly. It's such a minor bump in the road compared to what could be. And compared to things I've dealt with in the past. I trust there will come a time when my laundry and housework are again done on a regular basis. When I don't wake up and realize I haven't watered my plants in nearly two weeks. (Some plants will forgive this, some will not.) Or blogged about anything other than myself in who knows how long!

In the meantime, I find myself very thankful for the privilege of being able to keep up a steady dialogue with the Lord through this time. He sustains me and gives me peace. He calms the little storms of frustration at learning new systems, policies and procedures. And reminds me that by no means did my future fall from His hand when my job went bye-bye.

My little bump in the road, while bringing its bit of angst, also feels like I've hit a sacred time in my life. I'm learning big new things, taking a Big Girl Pill now and then, and continuing to grow up. That's in no way a bad thing!

Hi Kids!

Hey, Tess and Aron! I don't really have much to say about leading you on this wild goose chase, except that I love you with all my heart! And that I'm feeling a little free and silly lately. I guess getting canned (I still love saying that!) for the first time in my life just has that effect.

So did you respond to the survey?

By the way, if you could somehow join us for church on Easter, that would be awesome. Also we'll be cooking an incredible meal later on. No strings attached, though. The rosemary leg of lamb, mint sauce, vegan garlic mashed potatoes and gravy, and ambrosia salad will all miss you.

We'll at least save the chocolate bunny heads for you, though. Otherwise, the little varmints are all ours from the neck down!

Love you forever, Ma

It's "Servolution" time!

Did I spell it right? Sure hope so. I have great admiration for those who are able to come up with unique words like that. And I pray (join me now) that "servolution" becomes a concept that gets us (NLCC) SO fired up, it starts a ripple effect that goes on and on, and ON! And that because of it, the word "servolution" will actually be in a semi-normal dictionary no more than 10 years from now.

Hey, God's BIG... It could happen!!!!

Our culture already knows the concept, of course. We hear phrases like "puttin' your money where your mouth is" and "walkin' the talk." Unfortunately, we also hear things like, "Hell no, I'm not going to church! Those church people are all hypocrites! They want ME to obey a bunch of rules that THEY don't even follow!" And how sad that sometimes that assessment is truer than we'd like to admit.

So what I'm saying is, let's take church (God's doings) outside of the church (an inanimate building). Let's change the stereotype some people have of "church." While we're at it, let's change THE WORLD. Jesus did. And we are His agents of change today.

"Change you can believe in"? We already have a Messiah, thanks very much. His name is Jesus. Know Him.

Pray, pray, PRAY! Get ready for SERVOLUTION! Get ready for God's move!

Doing My Work Heartily...

I haven't had anything interesting to say since losing my job... not that I ever did! And I STILL don't! I've worked more and harder since being let go than I have in a long time. I'll explain: For at least the short-term I got picked up by the company that Emanuel is outsourcing to, primarily to work on the Radiology module which isn't "going over" to the new company for reasons I don't know enough "computer geek" to explain or even understand myself. So I'm still at my old workstation doing Radiology, while not having to answer phones or do any of the other troubleshooting I used to help with, since I DON'T REALLY WORK THERE! In the meantime I'm trying to learn their main systems, which so far don't strike me as very user-friendly, but it's probably too soon to tell. Since being "canned" (I love using that word! It sounds so dramatic!) I have worked every single day except last Sunday. And I'll be working today, as well. I think they may have underestimated the volume of work that'd be coming from Emanuel.

This morning I feel like I've been run over by a truck; the fibromyalgia is screaming at me, with my dirty house chiming in. So why would I want to do this to myself, while seemingly helping out an employer who maybe didn't show a lot of loyalty to me (and others)? For the very simple reason that I felt like the Lord asked me to. With several Bible verses to reinforce the idea. Didn't tell me... He asked me, very lovingly and graciously. He's my very life... How could I refuse Him?

No one asked about the dentist, but I'll tell you anyway. I have a big phobia about going to the dentist. I needed two fillings redone on opposite sides of my mouth. In a seemingly nonsensical move I decided to have them both done at the same time just to get the whole thing out of the way. Guess when I got that done? You guessed it... on the very last day of my dental coverage. Go figure... "more than coincidence"!

Still no word on the COBRA insurance, but Elizabeth is finally improving now on steroids.

Thanks for all the prayers, and for all the words of encouragement. The Family of God rocks!!!

Down But Not Out (And Not Really That Down)

Many thanks to those who have expressed their concern about the news on my last post. I'm serious, I really am having fun, in a way. Serious about having fun. I have no idea what I'll be doing or whom I'll be working for a year from now, but in the meantime, it's an interesting ride. Knowing the Lord makes such a difference! (No duh!)

One somewhat urgent prayer request I would make is that our health insurance situation would be cleared up quickly. I'm anxiously awaiting paperwork to sign up for COBRA. Anxious because my stepdaughter Elizabeth, who is in her first year of college, has (as far as can be determined) no other insurance coverage to fall back on, and she has been so sick lately.

And remind me to tell you about the dentist!